Between Daughters and Fathers: Enriching and Rebuilding Your Adult Relationship
Linda Nielsen, Ed.D.
At last! A no-nonsense, entertaining, and insightful book for dads and daughters who want more from their relationship—or who want to understand and rebuild it on an adult level.
Dr. Linda Nielsen addresses the questions that daughters and dads regularly ask her—and a lot more. Based on two decades of work with hundreds of dads and daughters, Between Fathers and Daughters summarizes cutting-edge research in clear language and offers compelling stories about real people—including well-known celebrities.
Some of the topics include:
* Why is it important to try for more from your relationship at this point?
* How can dad give advice without making his daughter mad?
* How can a daughter get him to treat her like a grown-up?
* How can a dad get his daughter to stop treating him like a cash machine?
* How can daughters and dads communicate better when they're so different?
* How can dads and daughters talk as adults about that one topic that still creates tension?
* How can the mistakes most dads and daughters make during the college years be avoided?
* What can be done about mom's or stepmom's jealousy?
* What can be done about those difficult divorce or remarriage issues?
* How can dads and daughters rebuild their trust if they're barely speaking?
* What's unique about African American or lesbian daughters' relationships with their dads?
* What about daughters whose fathers haven't been in their lives?
With candor and humor, Between Fathers and Daughters exposes the half-truths, downright lies, and family dynamics that prevent so many dads and daughters from having a more relaxed, more meaningful, more communicative relationship, regardless of age. Eye-opening research facts, tough questions, personal assignments, father-daughter activities, and self-assessment quizzes guide the reader on a personal journey. Explaining why most daughter-dad relationships haven't reached their full potential or have unraveled, Nielsen provides hope as she shows fathers and daughters how to make changes now!
Praise for Between Fathers and Daughters:
"The only word that consistently went through my mind as I was reading was 'remarkable!' The book is amazing—thoughtfully weaving research findings, common sense advice, principles of psychotherapy and personal stories into a compelling work that has immense promise to alleviate the weight and pain of daughters being estranged from their fathers. Presuming to speak on behalf of the fathers to whom you will restore the great gift of their daughters, thank you!"
—Dr. Sanford Braver, Arizona State University, author of Divorced Dads: Shattering the Myths, and advisor to President Bill Clinton's Fatherhood Initiative
"Nielsen's book breaks new ground by including men as significant parents. Helpful for more than their financial contribution to their children, fathers must not only be permitted but encouraged toward a role beyond the stranger who signs the checks. So I say 'read this book!'"
—Karen DeCrow, attorney, former president of the National Organization of Women
"To say we love without knowing what we are loving is a wasted life. To discover our dad's or our daughter's love is to both discover them and ourselves. Nielsen's book guides us to both by data that makes us question what we know; by insights that help us discover what we don't know; and questionnaires that help us stumble into ourselves. Every dad and daughter must read it."
—Warren Farrell, author of Father & Child Reunion and Why Men Are the Way They Are
"Dr. Nielsen brilliantly brings home the facts about what really happens in families of divorce and offers practical solutions. This easy to read guide is backed by countless references and full of interesting and insightful quizzes. It masterfully separates facts from fiction and exposes the secret and hidden realities for many moms, dads, and daughters involved in divorce. Understanding, compassion, and healing are inevitable for readers. Research and real life stories are combined with interesting and thought-provoking quizzes and self tests. Dr. Nielsen masterfully uses this combination to unlock the secret and well-hidden realities of what really happens in divorce. Her practical insights and recommendations will bring understanding and healing for all who dare to look."
—Maureen Geddes and Bob McGuire, attorneys, co-presidents of Canadian Equal Parenting Council
"A tour de force in the under-explored area of father-daughter relationships, Dr. Nielsen's 25 years of research provide a masterful handbook written in a disarmingly casual conversational style. With 200 heavy-duty citations to also entice the academic community, a lovely blend of anecdotal stories, crisp statistical summaries, and handy self-test quizzes, the author clearly understands communication. The chapter on divorced father-daughter relationships is superb and worth the price of the book alone. This one's a keeper—both as a dad's how-to manual on daughters, and as a daughter's what-makes-Dad-tick reference guide."
—Canadian Equal Parenting Council
"This is a hugely important book about a hugely important topic: healing the relationship between fathers and daughters. Professor Nielsen writes with more wisdom, experience, and care about this than anyone else out there. If you are a father or a daughter, or someone who cares about a daughter and father, get this book!"
—Joshua Coleman, Ph.D., senior fellow on contemporary families, author of When Parents Hurt: Compassionate Strategies When You and Your Grown Child Don't Get Along
"Dr. Linda Nielsen is at the vanguard of educators and authors who know that the relationship between fathers and daughters is fundamental and critical to the development of whole, healthy women. Her book offers insights and practical advice for daughters and fathers. Nielsen's work deserves our unending gratitude."
—Jonetta Rose Barras, columnist, political analyst, and author of Whatever Happened to Daddy's Little Girl: The Impact of Fatherlessness on Black Women
"Girls with loving, involved fathers flourish and become strong, secure women. Based on years of experience and recent research, Dr. Linda Nielsen tells fathers and daughters, in any family situation, how to nurture this core relationship."
—Elizabeth Marquardt, Institute of American Values, author of Between Two Worlds: The Inner Lives of Children of Divorce
"Linda Nielsen's Between Fathers and Daughters is an insightful, powerful work which gets beyond the stereotypes to provide a real-world examination of a tremendously underrated relationship—the loving, special bonds fathers share with their daughters."
—Glenn Sacks, men's columnist and radio host of His Side
"Nielsen identifies the fears, hurts, and anger that separate fathers and daughters and—more important—she gives powerful tools to move beyond the past. Drawing on her extensive knowledge and expertise, Nielsen shows you how to reconnect, repair, and recapture a loving relationship. Stop feeling sorry for yourself, stop feeling angry, get moving before it is too late with Nielsen's expert advice."
—Richard A. Warshak, Ph.D., author of Divorce Poison: Protecting the Parent-Child Bond from a Vindictive Ex
"Linda Nielsen's work on healing the father-daughter relationship gives me hope for the future. At a time when healthy family ties are more necessary than ever, Nielsen's compassionate treatment of the experiences of both father and daughter is nothing short of revolutionary. Well researched and emotionally resonant. A must read for anyone looking to more fully understand the importance of this archetypal relationship."
—Rebecca Walker, author of Black, White, and Jewish: Autobiography of a Shifting Self and Baby Love
"Nielsen's newest book courageously explains the dynamics that interfere with father's relationships with their adult daughters. I can't think of a book that could offer more to a dad and daughter."
—Steven Ashley, director of Divorced Fathers Network
"Wow! It can be explosive to talk about relationships between older daughters and their dads. Dr. Nielsen's no-nonsense, fair-minded and loving approach shows both daughter and dad positive paths to a strong relationship—a relationship that isn't dependent on denigrating mothers or believing myths about how families work. This is a landmark book."
—Joe Kelly, president of Dads and Daughters, and author of Dads and Daughters: How to Inspire, Understand, and Support Your Daughter
 | LINDA NIELSEN, EdD, is president of the American Coalition for Fathers and Children, professor of women's studies at Wake Forest University, and the author of Adolescence: A Contemporary Voice and Motivating Adolescents: A Handbook for Parents and Teachers. SHe has taught her course on fathers and daughters for twenty years and has received numerous awards for her research and writing. She lives in Winston Salem, North Carolina. |
$16.95, Paperback
ISBN-10: 1-58182-661-3 (Paperback)
ISBN-13: 978-1-58182-661-6 (Paperback)
Paperback Available September 2008
